Most people dig good wine and food, so the New York Wine and Food Festival seems like a guaranteed winner, with myriad events over the weekend devoted to savoring both things to the max. But the word "festival" is a little more ambiguous, and depending on which event you attend, that last F in NYWFF can sometimes stand for "Fuuuuuckingcrowded!" Last night's kick-off at Chelsea Market was swarming with foodiots and not for the agoraphobic; at times it got so packed that the festive vibe almost turned surly—particularly when a certain someone elbowed that woman's wine glass. (Sorry!)

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is being remembered for her diplomatic skills by brokering peace between Conan O'Brien and Newark mayor Cory Booker, who have had some sort of feud about Newark—O'Brien had joked, "The Mayor of Newark, New Jersey wants to set up a citywide program to improve residents' health. The health-care program would consist of a bus ticket out of Newark" and then it started a volley of threats (Booker put O'Brien on Newark Airport's no-fly list) and more jokes.

Today would have marked John Lennon's 69th birthday, and surely the Strawberry Fields section of Central Park is seeing a lot of action for the occasion. However, one reader says that while the mosaic "is typically covered in flowers, adorned with trinkets and messages, and surrounded by people gathering to sing songs and pay tribute to the late Beatle. Early this morning, I found a lone salutation and a small army of the NYPD preparing for the onslaught of fans and tourists alike."

Last year, the NY Times revealed that almost all Long Island Rail Road employees who applied for disability got it—for instance, in 2004, 97% of employees who retired after the age of 50, applied for and received disability and some of those "disabled" retired employees are out on golf courses, hitting the links. Attorney General Andrew Cuomo called it a "cottage industry" of fraud and the Railroad Retirement Board, which oversees claim approval, said it would use greater oversight. But it turns out that a staggeringly high number of LIRR employees are still getting approved for disability.

Brah, Phish is returning to the Garden. Not Jones Beach, not some festival across the country... Manhattan. This December 2nd, 3rd and 4th, the band will descend upon this fair city, bringing with it a flood of hippie supernumeraries. This is great news for Phish fans, and possibly a warning for the rest of you to take a 3-day trip out of town. Tickets go on sale October 23rd, unless you wanna hold out for a miracle.

With Anthony Marshall found guilty of looting the $200 million estate of his mother—the late philanthopist Brooke Astor—the tabloids are reveling in the drama of it all. Heck, the Post goes for the gusto with the headline "Tony's Miss Piggy skewered in Astor verdict," referring to Marshall's wife Charlene.

              

Click on the film stills for more on this week's new releases and repertory screenings, which also include An Education, The Damned United, Adventures of Power, Free Style, Good Hair, The Heretics, Peter and Vandy, Yes Men Fix the World, Lisztomania, Bronson, Paranormal Activity, Pretty in Pink, and Sixteen Candles,

Pro tip for all you artists out there: make your work look exactly like a photograph and you will win cash prizes! The NY Times reports that 50-year-old Brooklyn painter Ran Ortner was awarded the grand prize of $250,000 last night at ArtPrize, a public competition in Grand Rapids, Michigan.

The team behind the Yes Men movie are doing a great job getting audiences at Film Forum to participate in direct-action stunts after the screenings. On Wednesday night organizers persuaded most people in the audience to head over to a nearby Chase bank and write political stuff on the sidewalk with coal—because JP Morgan Chase underwrites Massey Energy, which does a lot of mountaintop removal coal mining. Anyway, last night they kicked it up a notch.

The wondering can stop: President Obama has endorsed City Comptroller Bill Thompson in the NYC mayoral race. Although he didn't make the endorsement himself—press secretary Robert Gibbs announced it. According to the Daily Politics, Gibbs said, "The president is the leader of the Democratic Party and, as that, would support the Democratic nominee."

       

This Saturday, as part of Open House NY, the Green-Wood Historic Fund and Dance Theatre Etcetera will bring Angels & Accordions to the cemetery. "A site-specific, live music and dance performance that guides audience members through historic Green-Wood Cemetery’s rolling hills, highlighting its unparalleled collection of sculpture and monuments." Looks like the 30 dancers involved have been doing some practicing! To check it out in real life, head over there tomorrow at noon or 3:30 p.m.

Someone slipped the 44-page ruling in the Jeremy Piven sushi saga to the Times, and it's a must-read for the Piven completist. You'll recall (because we wouldn't let you forget) that last December the Smokin' Aces star abruptly quit the Broadway production of Speed-the-Plow, claiming that excessive seafood consumption—not excessive partying—had left him exhausted with "dangerously high" mercury levels. But we never found out exactly what unfolded during the emotional, three-day arbitration hearing in June. Until now.

Spotted on Mott between Spring and Prince: a passive-aggressive note to a mysterious anti-pooper scooper! We just can't help but think this note could have been written better, though. It currently reads: "To person whose dog has taken a shit twice this week and you didn't pick it up. I'll be watching. If I catch you it won't go well for you." The threatening tone is there, but it doesn't seem to have that certain... je ne sais quoi. Next time maybe just try to sick the Sanitation Department on the Pooper-trator.

Yesterday, the defense rested in the trial of State Senator Hiram Monserrate. The Queens Democrat is accused of slashing his girlfriend Karla Giraldo on purpose in a jealous rage (he and she both say it was an accident) and faces felony charges. Monserrate opted for a bench trial, so Justice William Erlbaum will decide on a verdict; Erlbaum said, "I don’t know how this thing is going to turn out as we sit here today"

A reminder to anyone going to tonight's Yankees-Twins game—you might want to take NYC Transit's Nostalgia Train, which leaves Grand Central at 3:45 p.m. The four-car train, which headed to the Bronx on Wednesday, makes "all express stops on the Lexington Avenue Line and arriving at 161st Street-Yankee Stadium about 35 minutes later."

       

Those tabloid bottom-feeders at the Daily News are so desperate for page views that they've been reduced to publishing a gratuitous photo spread documenting the release of the 2010 Hooters calender. It's far beneath Gothamist's dignity to link to such lowbrow frat-bait, but we have taken the time to gather some photos from the event—just so you can fully understand the shameless hucksterism that's gripped the Zuckerman organization. We've also got some barely SFW video below, too... for reference.